Why I murder potatoes, as fast as possible

#1
  1. because FUCK YOU, thats why
  2. if i try and let them do the mission even a little bit it turns into a 3 minute mission speedrun to the chopper
  3. I JUST played a match where i found an OWLF recording on the way to gank the ft at spawn, and i KNEW there was no way theyd find it due to its location so I uncloaked and tried to lead the ft to it, including “DONT SHOOT, RECORDING THIS WAY” “STOP SHOOTING IM TRYING TO HELP”
    “HEY IDIOTS THERES A RECORDING HERE, PLEASE GROW A BRAIN STEM” and got gunned down for my efforts.

Die in a fuckin plasma fire, fireteam

6 Likes
#2

Incredible the amount of smarts people have when playing as someone who is suppose to be the target of a kill. I suppose yuo wanted a sit down with a cup of tea to talk things over?

1 Like
#3

You didn’t need to say anything else, this right here is the only justification needed.

1 Like
#4

yeah, that was kind of the point of spamming DONT SHOOT ME, cuz they normally shoot me, ya know? How else do you propose to make a truce under hostile conditions? should i send them an email next time? heaven forbid i try to do something NICE for the ft for once since i usually murder them in 2 minutes flat. But gee, thanks, next time Ill just the recording for myself, murder the ft, and let them know what they missed out on while i tea bag them and spam candy. Is that what you’d prefer? should i NEVER try and help the ft? ever ever ever? Fuck you, dickless, at least I tried.

#5

indeed. my favorite salt is new players complaining how OP the pred is. Yep, pred is def op, now run in fear little ones, run in fear while i stalk you.

#6

Fuck potatoes… buff the bots

#7

good thing that bot was there to save your bacon

#8

personal bodyguard, but I failed to escape the blast

dude later was asking how we melted him so fast… we told him “it wasn’t us dude, bot carried us to victory, lmao”

1 Like
#9

OOF

#11

You had me at “Because FUCK YOU” that’s why. I treat everyone I’m fighting the same. If we are matched together the Black Flag is up. Unless the FT does the T-Bag Unworthy Dance, then they all die.

#12

I mostly do it because I’m busy and always have other stuff to do and I want to get as many matches in as I can before fun time ends… mostly.

#13

This is honestly the only reason needed. Most potatoes are the epitome of dumpy, you try and help them and either they can’t hear you, or can’t understand you. I’ve wasted matches trying to help out the last guy to reinforce, and he’ll either hide, randomly wander, or just do the missions by himself. The concept of why he’s still alive when his buddies were whacked in less than three minutes is alien to him. Several times I’ve given up, wasted him, and apologized on comms post-match for his idiocy.

OCCASIONALLY, the last guy will do the Teabag Of Peace. This is where it all depends on how you’re feeling. I’ve gotten on comms and been like, “nope” and filled him full of arrows. Other times, like once last week, I had the last guy dead bang, but he did the TOP, I was like, sure, whatever, popped a few squats back and leaped away. He, or she, they were young, got on comms and very exasperatedly thanked me for letting them win. And it is a good feeling, honestly.

#14

thats not part of the taunt wheel you know. and its a taunt wheel, not a “yautja speaks with feeling wheel”. There is nothing on that wheel to express anything you wanted to say. That is why if you got on the mic, spoke up and actually spoke to one of them potatoes , you’d probably get a better reaction from them. So the issue lays with you i’m afraid.

#15

To be honest, your first point on why your murder taters applies here too. I’ve had Preds come in and be like, “I’m want to help you guys win! C’mon, I just wanna help!” and that’s a no go for me, champ. Its easier to trust a FT to not kill you than it is to trust a Pred. At any given moment that Pred can come in and waste the team and laugh about it. I don’t care what you say, if I’m FT and I see you I’m engaging with the intent of making you explode.

1 Like
#16

Never trust a predator! Even if his intentions were well placed 99% of the game, and then at chopper time he wastes you!

#17

Exactly. I mean rarely you get those nice Preds that don’t pull that shit, but I’m not running with that kind of anxiety and constantly watching my back while I hear clicking and bow and plasma shots around me. I’d rather be killed during an actual engagement than a “haha gotcha fuck you” at exfil.

#18

I WAS on the mic, dipstick. Ofc there’s no “don’t shoot me” on the taunt wheel. Fuck, you’re one of the potatoes aren’t you?

#19

So, if a pred got on comms, and told you to follow him to an OWLF recording, uncloaked, not shooting you, would you follow him? Cuz that’s what I did and the stupid fucks gunned me down anyway. Next time I’m killing all but one, showing it to him, then killing him anyway.

#20

So you don’t know when a team is gud or not even from the first 3 minutes? Thats a sign you need to get gud…Ned (not Pred).

#21

No, I’d spot him and light him up. One, because I don’t trust him, and two, I don’t care enough to collect the recordings, and if others do that’s not my business.